The Hatewatch blog is managed by the staff of the Intelligence Project of the Southern Poverty Law Center, an Alabama-based civil rights organization.

The Words of Bishop Eddie Long

By Robert Steinback on September 23, 2010 - 6:17 pm, Posted in Anti-LGBT

Long before Bishop Eddie L. Long became embroiled this week in allegations of using his leverage as pastor and mentor to compel three teenage boys into sexual relationships, the leader of the Atlanta-area New Birth Missionary Baptist Church recorded a sermon – and sold copies of it in the church bookstore – denouncing homosexuality and attributing society’s problems to men becoming more like women and women more like men.

“The problem today and the reason why society is like it is, is because men are being feminized and women are becoming masculine,” Long says. He then rejects the notion that homosexual orientation can’t be changed. “You can not say, ‘I was born this way’… I don’t care what scientists say, If you say you were born this way, then you’re saying, ‘God, you’re a liar! And I see this thing down here but I’m going to ignore it!’ ”

With the church’s website down this week, it isn’t known if copies of the undated sermon, entitled “Back to the Future,” are still offered for sale. The Southern Poverty Law Center purchased a VHS copy while producing stories on Long and other African-American church leaders who opposed gay rights for its Spring 2007 edition of Intelligence Report.

Much of Long’s sermon is devoted to the theme of proper gender roles. “It is the most unattractive thing I have ever seen, when I see women wearing uniforms that men would wear, and women fighting to get in the military!”

Long later mocks lesbians and female self-gratification. “So the woman gets converted, or perverted, to turn towards woman. Why would she turn toward woman? Because, she’ll turn toward woman because woman is acting like man.”

Later, he adds, “…and everybody knows it’s dangerous to enter an exit!”

He continues, “And everybody knows, ladies, if you go to the store and buy this device [marital aids], it’s Memorex! It ain’t real!”

Long later says, “That’s the reason why we got sexual immorality. That’s the reason why there’s a rise in the gay agenda.  That is the reason why… Church won’t say nothing — It’s amazing, church folk:  ‘Well, I’m gay. Well, ‘Just don’t bother me. Or you can bother me.’  That’s the only statements. You don’t say, ‘and the Lord said.’ You’re out of order. You’ve turned the truth into the lie. You can be converted. You were not born that way! Let me pray with you. Let me tell you, don’t you be conformed to this world. But be ye transformed from the, ‘Well, I don’t know what I am.’ Tell it, take your clothes down, I’ll show you who you are!”

Later, Long says, “And God said, ‘Everybody in here that knows what’s right and ain’t practicing, and every woman that knows what to do, but still want to act like a woman that, of the 90’s that the world has described, God says, and to every man that knows what God is saying to do and you’re still acting like the boys on the corner, “God says you deserve death!”

  • Ruslan Amirkhanov

    Very true Tara. I remember how in the evangelical churches you would often be subjected to “testimonials”- where people would make what amounted to public confessions. It was implied that one must continue supporting the church and accepting its doctrine lest they fall back into their previous sinful lifestyle.

  • Tara Moon

    It seems that there is a general unawareness that religious fundamentalism involves a process that results in an inability to reason critically. Indeed, Christian fundamentalists are often taught to believe that thinking opens up a door for Satan to enter. Add to that the fact that a significant number of fundamentalist “churches” function as cults and it is not difficult to believe that a pastor could talk someone heavily under his influence into doing anything. David Koresh is a case in point. Note that when I use the term cult I do not refer to ideology but, rather, to a group that uses deception to recruit, threats and intimidation to retain members and is usually pyramid-shaped with an “all-knowing, all powerful” charismatic leader at the tip of the pyramid.

  • Mitch Beales

    Thanks SPLC for putting this in perspective. Eddie Long was a bad man long before any of these recent charges surfaced.

  • Don

    Two items of concern for me are: 1. Long’s statements to date are all about him. He is the “David vs the Goliath”, he is “not the man portrayed in the media”, he is the victim, etc. A true man of God and genuine Christain would immediately express his concern for the young men, his accusers, and ask for prayers and guidance for them, not prayers for his own innocence. This would go a long way to dispell his guilt. He has not done anything of the kind, but rather attacks the boys and blames them for his personal discomfort. 2. Parrhesia is dead right about sexual predators, and age is just not an issue except legally. Boys are known to mature slowly emotionaly, yet even that is not really of consequence. Anyone can be manipulated in their thinking and confused about correctly expressing their emotions sexually when they are being preyed upon; even more so with an authority figure and especially from a religous authority figure such as Long. It is the predator who is cunning here, not the victims!

    Long’s preaching about many things is hardly Christian. Jersus taught about poverty being good for the soul, not riches. He taught about loving our neighbors as ourselves, not excluding some of them: in fact the parable of the Good Samaritin specifically directs us to look beyond our comfort zone. A Jew helping a Gentile was radical at the time of Our Lord – perhaps as radical as a Christian befriending a gay man is today. In fact the only time in scripture that Jesus is actually angry with someone is when He finds His Father’s House overrun by the money changers. God of course can forgive all sins, but I do ponder Eddie Long getting his Bentley thru the ‘eye of the needle'; and his hypocritical and sinful rhetoric about gays and lesbians won’t help either!

  • Carter

    Dear Jeff Stanley :

    I looked all through my DSM-IVr and could not find the diagnosis “sex addict”. Perhaps because such a thing does not exist?
    !2-Step programs by their own admittance have perhaps a 5% success rate in alcoholic populations whereas the spontaneous remission rate for general populations of alcoholics are approximately 50%*.
    Sexual predators on the other hand are a whole different group. They do NOT appear to respond the 12-Step-ism or for that matter many differing formats of treatment.
    IF this man DID indeed socially manipulate these young men he is not a swell candidate for treatment simply because he abused a power discrepancy between him and those who trusted him.

    It has been pointed out, quite eloquently that this man (should he be convicted) is an unethical SOB who deserves what he will get.

    I am certainly willing to keep an open mind about the man’s guilt or innocence but in the matter of allowing a predator to “go to meetings, work the Steps, & get a Sponsor” instead of prison time…..FORGET IT.

    12-Step treatment may have a dismal record for alcohol treatment but it has NO PLACE AT ALL for a sexual predator!
    NOTE: Clinical validation for 12-Step treatment history:
    R. G. Smart calculated that the spontaneous remission rate for alcoholism was between 3.7 and 7.4 percent per year.(Per sample studied given NO treatment)
    For studies of spontaneous remission in alcoholics, see: (From Bufe; 48.2% total during 5 yr sample 320 indv.)

    * Spontaneous Recovery in Alcoholics: A Review and Analysis of the Available Research, by R. G. Smart
    Drug and Alcohol Dependence, Vol. 1, 1975-1976, p. 284.
    * Recovery Without Treatment, by Thomas Prugh
    Alcohol Health and Research World, Fall 1986, pp. 24, 71 and 72.
    * Alcoholism as a Self-Limiting Disease, by Leslie R. H. Drew
    Quarterly Journal of Studies on Alcohol, Vol. 29, 1968, pp. 956-967.
    * Spontaneous Remission in Alcoholics: Empirical Observations and Theoretical Implications, by Barry S. Tuchfeld
    Journal of Studies on Alcohol, Vol. 42, No. 7, 1981, pp. 626-641.

  • Jeff Stanley

    “Take your clothes down and I’ll show you who you are.”

    Eegads. Sex addicts, especially the abusive kind, always tip their hand. They can’t help it, it seems.

    But they can find help, if they want it. The Twelve Step program of Sex Addicts Anonymous offers hope to those hopelessly enmeshed in the cycle of addiction, irrespective of orientation. A program which only requires one thing: the capacity and willingness to be honest.

    Lawsuits and the loss of your church are looming. What’s it going to take, pastor?

  • skinnyminny

    I agree with you 100%. Oh, you keep hitting the ball out of the park! Damn you’re good!!

    You are sooo right about these people and the hypocrisy. Funny you’ve mentioned this – here in Califas, some are standing behind Meg Whitman, in spite of her latest controversy.

    Some of these people CLAIM they are against illegal immigration, and against illegal immigrants having children here, aka as “anchor babies.”

    Here’s the hypocrisy, to me, that is, Whitman’s babysitter/housekeeper worked for 9 years in her (Whitman’s) home. Out of all the 9 years, she let a ‘stranger’ in her home? She never had conversations with the sitter/housekeeper? Well, yes, I believe she did. It came out that the sitter had a baby about 2 years ago, here.
    Thanks Ruslan!

    ***Anti-immigration folks, I thought you didn’t want anymore ‘anchor babies’, and didn’t want to pay for their medical… I thought you had a problem with illegal immigrants driving on our roads. Which begs for this answer did she have insurance? Also, the anti-immigration groups complain that the immigrants are taking jobs from Americans! Yet, no one complains that as Americans, we take drug tests, TB tests, background checks for any job, but the rich and big corporations hire people without even knowing who they are if the price is right! You complain that immigrants are taken against their will if they owe money to the people that bring them here – did you guys stop to wonder that if Whitman’s sitter/housekeeper owed money to these type of people, could Whitman or her family become targets….

    I’m not against illegal immigration. I just want you (anti-immigrant groups) to know that your arguments are baseless and without merit. You argue your positions, but, I find a lack of credibility in every one of them.

  • legalhound

    One thing that has been overlooked here is the fact that a good number of these boys were on “scholarship”. This meant that if they said no they would have to write their own ticket home. That puts a whole new spin on the power balance. Besides, we are taught at an early age that some people you can just trust right away like doctors, police officers, firefighters, teachers and preachers. People in these positions are in a special place of trust for that reason. This automatic trust gives them quite a bit of power and the moment they cross the line they have abused that power.
    I’m not defending Eddie Long AT ALL, but I will say that I feel sorry for him in that he hates himself so much that he preaches that everyone who is attracted to members of the same sex deserve death. He obviously believes it because he has engaged in such destructive behavior.

  • american wetback

    unity church of omaha is one of those churches that welcomes people form all religions and all sexual preferences. even fred phelps gives them his highest rating, he says they are going to hell. who cares what anyone thinks of you, do your thing be yourself, make your own fun and carry your own water, damn the critics.

  • Carter


    I appreciated your outline of “grooming” behaviour I believe I understand what you have outlined & it has merit.

    However, there is a few things that cause me to pause. These young men were supposedly 16-17yr old? Young people grow up pretty fast these days. I am not saying that such manipulation could NOT take place; I just wonder if a young man of that age today is that naive such that they do not see an agenda coming a mile away. I really can’t say of course, because I’m not them.

    We have a very adroit illustration of mob mentality in the McMartin Pre-School case.
    I believe it’s critical that we allow justice to take it’s course without passing judgment prior to all the facts being weighed. Again, NOT because the guy is such a wonderful fellow…..but there MAY be another agenda beneath the surface. It appears…..we’re just saying this guy is a jerk because he is apparently a hypocrite.

    There is a very special reason why I say this. Social manipulation is quite easy with individuals of a strong stance on issues who are public, thus vulnerable toward a backlash. This guy was outspoken in his anti-gay sentiment. When a strong statement like that is made; the guy becomes very vulnerable. It’s like Al Gore saying he invented the Internet.
    No matter what I personally believe about the freedom of an individual to express his or her love for another adult, the anti-gay stance is not a popular one in most cosmopolitan areas nor for that matter all that logical when it comes to “reforming” a gay individual. Thus this guy is ripe for a set up.

    Please note: I am not saying the guy [Eddie Long] is not an imbecile and selling snake-oil. I’m just saying that I know quite a few young people and today they are not as naive as they may once have been. At 16yrs old they MAY have been easy prey for this guy OR there MAY be a whole other side to the story. I would feel a whole lot stronger if the individuals involved were 10 or 12 years old. However at 16 years old there is the element of adolescent rebellion that makes saying “fuck you” a great deal easier and setting up someone to take a BIG FALL a great deal more attractive.
    I could be dead wrong in this because many young people ARE very needy but it would seem they would display that at an earlier age.

  • Ruslan Amirkhanov

    Dick, in our last encounter we established that you have a problem managing simple logical concepts. Let me break it down for you- This guy condemned homosexuals while he himself engaged in homosexual behavior. This is known as hypocrisy. For example, Tea Partiers whining about taxes and fiscal responsibility while they did nothing during 8 years of waste and deficit spending on useless wars.


  • skinnyminny

    Hello Voodoo4ducks,
    First, I hope you accept my sincere apology, if my comments were misunderstood.

    What I was saying, is, people need to keep a close eye on their children. Simply, when minors are on the streets, there is a real danger. Whether that danger comes from someone looking to take advantage of them. This could be anything from gangs, or anyone. (BTW, I have nothing against LGBT community. I have two cousins that are gay (males), and a host of gay male friends).

    The plaintiffs are alleging that they were not a willing participant! I made the comment that they were of legal age to make a decision, that is, whether this is the type of relationship they want.

    Again, sorry for the misunderstanding.


  • Patricia A. Yates

    The Bishop shoud tell the truth, and leave, never to be seen again. those boys did not deserve that.

  • kelly

    With the church backing his finances…he thinks he can do anything and get away with it. Poor devil!

  • Dick Lancaster

    It has to be whites who are corrupting the black churches. After all, the SPLC knows that blacks aren’t capable of corrupting themselves–they’re victims.

    Why should people have any right whatsoever to condemn any behavior? Unless that behavior can be labeled right wing, then it’s perfectly alright to condemn.

  • Peter Hockley

    This man even sets off my limited gaydar.

  • Allah

    Long,and others like him(people who use their position and authority to control or compel others),will get what is coming to them.IF he is guilty of what they say he is.It still hasnt been proven in court and,at least for now,in this country you are innocent until proven guilty.

  • http://www, Johnny Lee Clary

    I am not defending Long, but I certainly find it interesting that certain people have already decided he is GUILTY based on accusations from troubled young men who have been in and out of trouble with the law and one of them being charged with 1st degree burglary of Long’s church. As of this writing as far as I know there has been no trial date set for Long, no arrest in this matter and the now adult men bringing the accusations are known criminals. As someone who works with police, I am a firm believer in law and order. If Long is found guilty then he should be punished to the full extent of the law. However, I do not believe you people need to be rushing to judgment on him when there has been no evidence whatsoever presented. The pictures of him that were supposedly texted to one of the men, basically just shows him showing off his muscles. That could be an encouragement to work out in get in shape. Why isn’t there any evidence of sexual encounters, sex tapes, text messages, emails, or witnesses? Think before you rush to judgment!

  • Parrhesia


    I don’t know the details of these boys’ lives, but I can tell you the general pattern of predators like this. They seek out easy targets – boys with low self-esteem, no father figure, seeking love, acceptance, and approval. The predator builds a relationship with these boys that – at first – is very fatherly. They engage in appropriate, non-sexual “male bonding” activities, eliciting a strong sense of love and trust from their targets. Then they begin to talk about sexual topics, generally starting with heterosexual behavior. They often share pornographic materials with the boys. They do this in order to make the boys feel comfortable with sexual topics and accept it as normal – no big deal. If the boys become aroused (pretty easy to do with a hormonal teen boy), the predator may try to convince them that the arousal is due to their feelings for the predator. They blur the boundaries in small incriments – this is called grooming.

    By the time the predator has worked up to sexual contact, their victims are emotionally dependent on them and unsure of what is acceptable and what is not. They may feel that they are wrong for being uncomfortable, or that they owe the predator for everything the predator has given. If there is fear, it is usually the fear that the predator will withdraw his love. Predators are also good at making sexual contact seem a necessary means of expressing love. When the predator is a charismatic and powerful man – the leader of a megachurch, for example – a vulnerable teenager can be manipulated into believing that their instincts are wrong. They may want to believe that their instincts are wrong, as well, since the reality they suspect is very, very painful.

    The victims of sexual predators like this are not stupid. They are chosen because they are emotionally vulnerable, and the predators are masterful manipulators. They will use any leverage they can find to get their way.

    The psychological harm from this kind of abuse is profound. The victims have to deal with questions about their own sexuality, feeling like they were at fault for leading the older man on, feeling stupid for allowing the sex, losing an important relationship, etc. on top of the direct sexual abuse.

  • Voodoo4ducks

    To: Kate,

    Yes, there is an unfairness in the treatment of sexual predators based on age/sex/sexual orientation. It’s disgraceful. However, I have major problems with closeted gay public figures in official positions vilifying gays in an open public forum or legislating against their rights.


    I want to remind everyone that are so quick to convict Bishop Eddie Long to remember the McMartin preschool trial.

    “…the kids involved in this hysteria have indeed suffered, but not at the hands of their teachers. And the abuse perpetrated against them by the child-protection movement gone mad are every bit as awful as the tyranny of incest.” Debbie Nathan

    I felt everyone knew I was lying. But my parents said, ‘You’re doing fine. Don’t worry.’ And everyone was saying how proud they were of me.” Kyle Zripolo, student at McMartin.

    “McMartin” was one of the first Multi-Victim Multi Offender (MVMO) child abuse cases. It lasted six years — the longest US criminal trial in history. At a cost to the state of $15 million, it was also the most expensive. No convictions were obtained. The main evidence of abuse was based on what the children testified were memories of repeated, sadistic, ritual molestation. Years later, child psychologists realized that such memories can be easily implanted in children’s minds by the interview techniques which were used at the time. Since psychologists and police investigators have changed their methods of interrogating young children, no more MVMO cases have surfaced in the U.S. and Canada. The children’s testimony was supported by medical tests, which were believed at the time to be accurate. Years later, they were found to be useless.

  • Voodoo4ducks

    To Skinnyminny:

    Homosexuals have no choice in their sexual preference, just as you as a heterosexual had no choice in yours. Was there ever a time you had to make a choice? To believe only a certain segment of society would choose their sexuality is ludicrous. Where this idea came from I will never know. In fact, there are many cases of homosexuality and bisexuality in the animal kingdom, proving that nature does not give one a choice. And, the “conversions” to heterosexuality have a high failure rate. Imagine what it would be like for you if most of the world were homosexual and you were told that every sexual instinct was wrong and should be converted to homosexuality? It’s time to obliterate this myth and stop blaming gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and the transgendered for who they are.

  • John

    peter guzzardo stated, “I look at my sexual preference as a gift,…..” Good for you, Peter.
    However, using the term “sexual preference” implies we are given any arrey of choices from which we pick a sexual preference.
    Perhaps the term sexual orientation would be a better term. Being gay, straight, or bi-sexual is not a preference choice but is just simply an orientation.
    Only bi-sexuals can claim a bit of a preference choice.

  • Bob

    For those LGBT folks who may have been shunned from church, there is an answer. The United Church of Christ whose motto is: “No matter who you are, or where you are on life’s journey, you are welcomed here”.
    My partner & I have Googled UCC Churches everywhere we go throughout the nation and have had no troubles finding a UCC church who advertises on their website that they are “Open & Affirming (ONA” and LGBT folk are welcomed there. We’re now going to one in Winston Salem NC and the people are ALL so friendly, welcoming and interesting to talk with and become friends. From the youth to the oldest person in the church, we are fully welcomed. You know that life journey everyone has been trying to find, the right church for you with the right people to befriend. we found ours at Parkway UCC in Winston Salem NC and I’ve achieved my life journey and found the perfect fit for me and religion. Oh, Buddhist, Gnostics, Agnostics, Hindu, all are welcome. Give em a try!

  • kate

    Long’s behavior aside, which I think points to the negative aspects of religion as social control against science, I am very disturbed by the notion that these young men are able to sue Mr. Long for being seduced.

    All the while young girls are paraded on day-time talk shows everyday, as young as 12, with titles such as “I”m having sex every dayt.” “I dropped out of school because I’m pregnant at 13…”

    and somehow, they get our ire and blame because of their ‘irresponsibility’ and their sordid, trampy ways, but when a young male is seduded by an older man immediately the public wants to hang the adult for perverting this poor young child, even up to age 17!

    17! We still as a society can’t seem to figure out that a 12 year old girl that is pregnant had no agency in that occurrence, but will force her to carry the pregnancy to term against all reasoning.

    But somehow we need to rally around young men long beyond the “age of consent” as being unwittingly pressured and conned — as a commentor states above, into homosexual behavior.

    The patrirachal admixture of homophobia, misogyny and willful ignorance makes me sick.

    Yes, ALL young people up to and even beyond the age of consent can be cajoled, tricked, manipulated, used, abused and it is wrong on a multitude of levels.

    I’m disgusted that the public seems to be far more preoccupied with the idea that homosexuals are scary predators threatening the precious patriarchy than they are with the real acts of sexual abuse and predation that go on and are ignored all the time.

  • Herbert E. Larson

    We all know that what the Rev. said is a big load of manure, but the really crazy part is you can find justification for his actions in the Bible. It has to do with sin guilt and redemption
    it is a book that can be interpreted many ways, the clause in the contract that allows this, to enter heaven one must sin. The depraved use this to justify their actions it then starts a set of actions that most times ends badly. It is very easy to say I would have been able to say no, and for that reason you most likely will not be chosen. Men of the cloth(all faiths) are trained in reading and interpreting people by their actions a man of God just bides his time till a perfect candidate for his perversion. Then with time gifts favors he brings the victim around to the thinking it is natural to be doing whatever the perversion is.

  • Marisa

    Eddie Long is NOT a good man, and I hope his career is over and that those he victimized can go on with their lives, without profound problems. HOWEVER, those in his “church” should have known he was not a good man simply by listening to his bull shit (and he’s not the only B.S. minister) and those of them who continue to defend him and listen to him are nnothing brainwashed MORONS who deserve to be shown to be the fools they are – I have no sympathy for people who listen to religious nuts to the point where they take leave of their senses and quit using their brains.

  • Ahab

    Long’s homophobia and machismo definitely seem like the defense mechanisms of a closet case. May his victims find justice and may the full truth emerge.

  • Sam Molloy

    It is written that a preacher better not get caught with:
    1. a dead girl
    2. a live boy
    3. a big ol’ pile of cash.

  • Lex

    The more homophobic a person is the more likly the person is a self hating closet case homosexual/lesbian, lets never forget Ted Haggard :)

  • skinnyminny

    I agree with one part of Long’s explanation – society is responsible. This is the only this part of that statement I agree with.

    First of all, con (confidence) artists look for people to prey on, whether they are using their skills as a street level con (i.e. pimp) or a person of the community con (one considered prominent – minister, politics, i.e. Mark Foley).

    Secondly, minors should not be allowed to travel across the world, or across state lines without a non-custodial parent, unless, of course, there are other minors, and it is for legitimate business, i.e. school type competition/performance.

    And finally, it should be noted, there are a lot of churches that pick up kids/minors that are homeless, runaways, or recently released from the justice system into the streets. These kids/minors sometimes have no choice but to run into the arms of people who may cause them more harm.

    I agree with the person who said that they had a choice to say yes or no. Yet, I also agree with the person who said they were a long way from home. I think it would be pretty hard to hitchhike home from another country.

  • peter guzzardo

    I happen to be gay. i did not elect to be gay. I was born that way. I look at my sexual preference as a gift, not an curse. I do not want to or believe that I need to change who I am because I do not find my sexual preference to be bad or evil or negative. Thank you Mr Julian Bond for having the courage to take a position of tolerance many years ago. I believe that we, as human beings, continue to evolve. My dream is that we grow our compassion and tolerance of what life happens to offer us. Stay green and grow!

  • jutta

    I will try it. As the lawyer explained, E. Long took a long time to win the confidence of the young men and to make them feel comfortable in his presence. The first physical contacts where seemingly innocent like rubbing an arm or massaging one’s neck. So the boys gradually got used to physical contact – which makes it difficult to find the right time so say “no” when the other transgresses that line where you don’t feel comfortable any more.

    Second, in some of the cases known so far, the sexual activity started during a journey abroad, so the young men may have felt that running out of the hotel room or telling Long to leave the room was not really an option.

    Third, some of the young men had been in trouble before they met Long, they may have needed a father figure and certainly developed a strong bond with him. It’s not really uncommon that people make foolish decisions when they fear losing a person by not submitting to their wishes.

    That’s quite a different situation than meeting a person at a party or a club and then say “no, thank you” when they come too close.

  • Carter

    I AM NOT DEFENDING EDDIE LONG That brother has his closet door locked up tight obviously.
    However I was 16-17 yrs old once and from what people told me I was a pretty good looking kid. I had a 30″ waist (that’s really a long time back) lifted a lot of weights, had nice skin, & dressed appropriately.
    I also had my share of hormones making decisions that were (on occasion); poor choices.
    But if someone came on to me and I didn’t want to get with it (with them) I’d say “no, that’s not me”. I’m not too sure what kept these guys from telling the Bishop “I don’t want to play that way”…..?

    If I WAS attending Church and actually listening; I would KNOW that I am not going to offend the Lord if I refuse the advances of anyone whom I do not love.Not even a 17 yr old male is that stupid.
    Sorry; I don’t get it……

    There IS a POWER discrepancy between a Therapist, social worker, Pastor, Doctor and client. This MAY be one reason why many therapists are so damn lousy at their job, because they put themselves on a different level from their client and the client lets them! But that’s still consensual. I have NO problem telling a therapist, doctor, or lawyer to go directly to hell don’t stop of collect $200.

    Perhaps someone could explain the power discrepancy issue clearly so that the reason for this as anything but an act of annoyance is being accessed?